Smug at the zoo

I made it! I made it through the first week back to work. I took it slowly. Got the work done, but didn't overdo it. I was well received by my colleagues who seemed excited to see me and graciously asked to see baby pictures. 

I woke each morning and spent time with Hunter and then raced home to see him each evening. The morning time is sweet because he is so happy and ready to interact. The evening time is sweet because he is winding down and loves his bath, books, and snuggle time. I do miss him terribly during the day, but also enjoy getting a shower early in the day and dressing professionally. I enjoy interacting with other adults and talking to Sharron about life. I enjoy doing something out of the house. I just need to be in two places at once. I've always wanted to do everything and not miss out, but this is a deeper need. A need to have my own professional life and be a full-time mother. I know that I don't get two lives, but that is a painful reality. 

I am very tired tonight. It's one thing to wake up in the middle of the night for feeds when the following day is simply filled with snuggling and watching TV while Hunter naps. It's quite another thing to wake up in the middle of the night for feeds when I have to drive 1.5 hours round trip to work and then take on a full day's work. Not to mention figuring out to fit in a little self care, eat dinner and fix lunch for the next day, and spend time with Jared. Our company just left this afternoon and while we were ever-grateful for Grandma's help this week, I think it will be good for Jared and me to have time and space to get into our new routine.