tea and other happenings

I know I had eye surgery and that's important to discuss. But first, I want to discuss Milo's. Milo's as in the "wonderful" southern restaurant located conveniently at exit 271. Jared and I had to grab something quick to eat last night and were on the way to chic-fil-a. I love chic-fil-a. Their spicy chicken sandwich, waffle fries, and diet lemonade combo is awesome and totally healthy according to Jared because they cook in peanut oil. Riiiight. I'm gonna start frying up my broccoli in peanut oil and maybe that'll go down easier as well. I digress. We were going to chic-fil-a and Jared had the idea of eating at Milo's instead. I agreed and we ate there. The fries were yummy. Hot and covered in seasoning. The splenda tea with pellet ice was tasty. And then, there was the burger. That had to be one of the most disgusting things I've ever eaten in my life. It was half-burned, covered in grease and some kind of nasty sauce, there was a random piece of hamburger patty from outer space in the middle of everything, ONE measly little pickle, and some chopped onion pieces. Jared told me that the reason it wasn't good was because I didn't get cheese on the burger. I seriously doubt that one piece of plastic wrapped American cheese would have saved the day. In this case or ever really. Yucky. I'm thinking of opening a restaurant of my own. I'm going to serve a gross main dish with cold tea and a nice side and rednecks will be tearing down the front door. Go team.

In other news though, I had eye surgery. It's easy to just say that I had LASIK eye surgery because folks are familiar with that. However, I did not have LASIK. I had PRK. There is a huge difference. LASIK is newer, better, faster, and much less painful as it involves two lasers. However, my wee little cornea was too think and I did not quality for the much preferable surgery option. In PRK, the doctor lovingly brushes the cells off my eyes and then applies the treatment with one laser. When I say lovingly I mean that the doctor has given me a valium to decrease the sense of absolute terror that my last view on God's green earth will be of a hospital room full of silver, sterile equipment and then he numbs my eyes while inflicting two corneal abrasions that will take days to heal. The sweet coordinator told me that my pain would be on a scale of 5-10 over the weekend after the surgery. I figured that's a 2-4 for me being that I'm the woman who skied on a broken ankle and goes to work with bronchitis. No, no. Apparently, I'm no match for corneal abrasions and neither is my mother. I think the whole thing was far worse for her and she could probably have used that valium more than me. I did get some good sleep though. You see (haha), I couldn't read, I couldn't watch TV, and I could not bear to be around light. So, I laid on the couch in the TV room with the black out curtains and slept for about 20 hours a day and more if I could possibly stand it.

Let me say one thing though. I discovered the key to the city, the key to sympathy and free stuff. You see, I wore these horrible huge dark glasses whenever I did manage to leave the house with my mother (like to go to the beauty parlor and get my hair washed) and I had to hold her arm. People thought I was blind. I got free ice cream. I got an hour long pedicure and leg massage for regular price. Pre-boarding here I come. Kiiiding. I think.

Anyway, I am on the road of recovery. My vision is still cloudy at times and I'm waiting for absolute clarity which will take about two weeks. I'm just exhausted though. This 8 hours of sleep a night is for birds.