Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens

I want to be grateful for the things in my life. But the truth is that I feel lonely right now. Which is strange since I work with wonderful people and am always around fun people in the evenings. But, I am tired of going to bed by myself and tired of eating breakfast alone and I definitely did not want to sit alone in church this morning. I believe that God is going to do even more for me in a relationship than I could imagine or dream. I believe that. But, sometimes it's hard to trust that God is going to do that. It's one thing to believe and another thing to trust. So, I decided this morning in church that I am going to ask as if I trust God for this. I am going to act as if God will take care of my food issues. i am going to act as if God will take me to the right man. I am going to act as if my God is big enough to handle and take care of my loneliness. And, in the meantime, I'm gonna increase things that help my mood: eating right, exercise, painting, dancing, laughing, writing, sleeping enough but not too much, avoiding facebook, listening to positive music, going to meetings, talking with my sponsor. That will be my part. I will act as if I trust God to do the rest.

One of my neighbors was robbed outside our apartment building last night. It really scared me. I have never felt unsafe in this neighborhood, but now I do. I just want to chat with that man and let him know how much he changed my perspective on my safety and sanity. I now walk with pepper spray in hand and I'm cautious everywhere. I probably needed to be more cautious, but I wish I lived in a world without fear and suffering and crime. Because a few people really ruin it for the rest of us.

I just finished reading The Great Train Robbery. It is an excellent read. The book was given to my father by my mother on his birthday in 1975. So, my father read the book 7 years before I was born and I read the book about 39 years after my father. Interesting to me.