When you dance

I just added the following pictures to the blog and realized that I could do a sweet father's day post about the padre. However, my original intent was to take myself back to that wonderful week with family and laughter and dancing and fun. Because this week has been just awful. 100% terrible. I got six new patients. I had paperwork and phone calls and stress coming out my ears. I had to do two sessions of the trauma group to catch up to the typical rotation of one group a week. And not only was it extra trauma group, it was (and still is since I have one more group next week) the worst group to date. It's been a terrible group. We started out on Tuesday with 5 of the 8 women not wanting to be there. There was a slight improvement to 4 out of 8 by Thursday. There were personality conflicts among the many Axis II ladies. There were attempts at rule breaking and one lady falling asleep as her peer cried about being next to the Pentagon during the terrorist attacks on September 11. Yeah, it was awesome. I had to use one of my new skills from the conference and put things in my container so I could get back to sleep at night after waking up. The container is a super cool guided imagery in which you image a container of some sort in a safe place and you put whatever you want in the container and leave it until you want/need to go back and get something out of the container. So, I would imagine putting my stress and anxiety in the container and then would mentally get back in bed. I've had tons of self-doubt this week feeling like a failure and incompetent and like I chose the wrong profession. I've wanted to crawl back in bed under the covers during the day and turn in a notice and go wait tables at night. How would you like your steak cooked? seemed easier than Why do you place the blame entirely on your mother for not protecting you and leave out your father? I'm just tired. And I feel completely stuck. I think I'm probably doing very well for myself and my age. I've got almost four years at one company. I'm running a specialty group and supervising a colleague. I'm getting various certifications. But, how do I know if I'm any good at what I do? There's no measure, no proof. Nothing really. I'd like a test with a grade, please. 

So, all that to say, I wanted to pull fun pictures out and go back to the fun of last week. The joy of  summer. The joy of family. The joy of being totally happy and care-free. Here they are. 

And, while I'm at it, happy father's day.